So you’ve met this great guy and you’re in love. And in a drunken, candle-lit get-to-know-you session, he admits that he cheated on his last girlfriend. But “he didn’t love her like he loves you.” Bullshit. That red flag is waving. He is going to cheat on you. This man cannot be trusted.

Once a cheater…always a cheater. What a bold, judgmental, bitter statement to make. But yeah, I’m gonna make it anyway, because it’s true. Now I personally have never cheated…well, there was that once…but is it really cheating if you end things with your significant other the day after it happens? I think not. Okay, so I’ve never really cheated, but to be extremely honest, I have been “the other woman” quite a lot. Why? Because it’s easy… the same as cheating.

The first time your man cheated, it was hard. It tore him up inside. He struggled with the decision. He was consumed by guilt and wondered to tell, or not to tell… But don’t worry, because just like everything else in life, practice makes perfect. Which leads me to my theory: Once a cheater…always a cheater. I promise you, every time he’s eaten that forbidden fruit, it’s gotten easier and easier. And once he got over that first guilt-ridden hurdle, it becomes second nature.

Another reason I think cheaters will always be cheaters is because by nature, people get off by breaking the rules. It’s addictive. Even the most prim and proper get a little rush by breaking the law. And once you’ve felt that rush once, you’ll want to keep feeling it again and again. Just like heroin. Yes girls…if your boyfriend has cheated in the past, you’re basically dating a heroin addict. He may give up the habit for a little while, but it’s called a habit for a reason. He’ll eventually fall off that wagon and go back to dippin’ that dick where it don’t belong.

Still don’t believe me? Have you ever heard of that little ‘ol saying: people don’t change. Well, cheaters are people. Therefore, come on…say it with me…cheaters don’t change. Once a cheater…always a cheater. Anyway you say it, you’re getting screwed. (And so is someone else.)

Even if you think you and your once-cheater boyfriend have the perfect relationship…even if you’re giving him so much sex he can’t walk…even if you cook him dinner and rub his shoulders to his heart’s content…he still wants more. If he knows his ex will fuck him…he’s fucking her. There’s at least 1 woman at his workplace that prefers one of those no strings attached relationships. He’s fucking her. If he’s done it once, he’ll do it again and again and again. Because it’s easy, it’s addictive, and people don’t change. How much more proof do you need?

Counter Point –

By Post Boy, Author of “Sometimes it’s OK to cheat”

As human beings we grow and learn. Yes in my youth I cheated on a girlfriend, I also shoplifted and did recreational drugs. As an adult I don’t steal, I don’t do drugs, and I don’t cheat. In high school I was a different person with different beliefs, but over a decade later I don’t see why you should punish the person I am for the person I was, especially since the only reason you know about my youthful indiscretions is because I’m open and honest enough to tell you. I’m not saying cheating is alright, I’m just saying that you should always hear a person out. Everyone has done something once in their life and regretted it, why make them pay for it even decades after the fact. There are people who break the law and become career criminals, just as there are people who do it once and learn their lesson. Why punish a person who learned their lesson about cheating possibly decades before even meeting you?

Last 5 posts by Janie James

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